It took me three tries to quit for good. Now I help others do the same

As part of our Stoptober series, we’re sharing the story of Elaine McHarrie, a stop smoking advisor at Your Health Torbay. Elaine smoked for 40 years herself before becoming an advisor and believes that lived experience is exactly what makes the support she offers work.

I started smoking when I was 11. Like a lot of people my age, it was peer pressure. You wanted to fit in, and back then smoking was everywhere: in films, in adverts, sold as glamorous for women and rugged for men. I smoked for 40 years, and it took me three attempts to quit for good.

When I finally got there, I found myself asking a question I now ask a lot of my clients: why is that little white stick so important to me? Why was I choosing it over getting my nails done, or a holiday? For me, honestly, smoking had become a bit like self-harm. There’s no real positive to it, once you’re honest with yourself.

I’ve been with Your Health Torbay for about 18 months now. When I saw the job advertised, I thought, I can do this. I’m non-judgemental, and I genuinely know how hard it is, because I’ve lived it myself.

Elaine McHarrie said,

“Never give up giving up. It took me three tries over many years to finally quit. Every quit attempt taught me something and brought me closer to stopping for good.”

How stop smoking support works

We have weekly appointments, either on the phone or face to face, and we talk about how the week’s gone: what’s worked, what hasn’t, and what we might try differently. We also provide nicotine replacement products, completely free, for the full 12 weeks of the programme. Between appointments, clients can also turn to Stubit, our new app, for extra encouragement and support whenever they need it.

We use a carbon monoxide monitor at every face-to-face appointment. Clients aim to get their reading below four, and watching that number drop week-on-week is a really powerful thing to see.

Another thing I encourage is a savings jar. Instead of hiding away the money you’d have spent on cigarettes, put it in a pot and watch it build up. One client, who’d smoked for over 50 years, paid for his first holiday just five or six weeks after quitting, using the money he’d saved on cigarettes.

Not everyone arrives ready. I once had a client whose daughter pretty much dragged him into clinic. He’d smoked for 60 years and clearly didn’t really want to be there. But he gave quitting a go anyway, with a double patch and a vape, and went from 60 cigarettes a day down to 20. Every week I’d ask him, do you want to keep going? And every week, he said yes. I think he was frightened, if I’m honest. A lot of people are, wondering what life will even look like without cigarettes. But it does get easier. It is okay.

Elaine McHarrie added,

“You don’t have to do this on your own, and you don’t have to feel any shame about needing help. I know exactly how hard it is.”

A lot of what people believe about smoking just isn’t true. People tell themselves they’ll put on weight without it, or that it helps their mental health, or keeps their stress down. But the evidence says the opposite. Yes, you get some withdrawal at first: you might eat a little more, feel a bit more agitated. But once that passes, your mood and your health both improve. Within a couple of days, breathing starts to feel easier, and your sense of taste and smell come back. People often ask me why they didn’t do it sooner. But it’s got to be the right time for you, and only you know when that is.

Why I do this

I’m proud of Torbay, and I’m proud of the people here. I want us to be healthy and happy, and if I can play a small part in that, that’s why I do this job. My favourite part is meeting and chatting with the lovely people of Torbay, even on the harder days.

We’re not perfect, and I don’t pretend to be. Nobody fails just because they have a bad week. We simply talk about what to try differently next time.

Elaine is one of the team behind Your Health Torbay’s stop smoking service, offering completely free and friendly stop smoking support. If you’d like support to quit smoking, call Your Health Torbay on 01803 422 422 or visit yourhealthtorbay.co.uk.

To learn more about Elaine’s own story, watch her episode of the Stopping Together podcast.